On castles, Scotland, and seeing the meaning of things

Something odd happened earlier this week. Beyond the laptop going wonky and all the strangeness of life in ground zero, that is.

A memory of my trip to Scotland popped into my head and wouldn’t leave. At first, I thought it was just because of how odd the sequence of events was. Then again, I’m Wiccan and there was so much of the trip that happened on a spiritual level for me. I spent a week not simply sightseeing, but healing my soul. Reconnecting with past lives, rejuvenating my spirit.

One thing I did was spend the night at Fa’side Castle. It’s a restored 14th c. castle that is now a B&B. Or it was when I stayed there. The owner has since been found guilty of embezzlement and the castle itself is up for sale or has been sold.

Faside 39 8.14

I’d dropped Tara off where she was spending the night, leaving the majority of my luggage with her. I would be checking into that place the next night. Fa’side was less than a 5 minute drive away. The hills weren’t wooded. I should’ve seen it, easily and clearly, from the road as we headed to Carberry (the other hotel). Never saw it.

I should’ve seen it as I drove from Carberry to the side road going to the castle. I never did. I navigated up the hill on a narrow road that was surrounded by crops. I should’ve seen it. I didn’t until I turned the last corner before the driveway to the estate.

I got into my tower. I say that because I had an entire tower to myself. A circular staircase led to the great room.

Faside 44 8.14

Another level up was the bedroom with an en suite bath. And then I could go up one more level and out on the roof.


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That’s Edinburgh in the distance, by the way.

I had a marvelous stay, checked out the next morning, and headed off to Carberry. Tara and I planned to head up toward Stirling that day. I tried to look back when I got to the road. Still could not see the castle.

I could see the road from the castle. I remember looking out a window and seeing it!

After I got Tara and we got on the road, she asked where it was because she wanted to see where I’d spent the night. I pointed to the area, but neither of us saw it. Or, if she did, she didn’t say anything. Given that we’d been excitedly pointing out castles, etc, for a week, she would’ve said something.

Came back to Carberry after a day of sight seeing. Still didn’t see Fa’side from the road. The next morning, we headed to Roslyn Chapel before I took her to the airport. I then went into Edinburgh for the day. Went back to Carberry. Still wasn’t seeing Fa’side.

Seriously, I was starting to wonder if it was visible from the road. All the evidence told me it would be. For whatever reason, it would not show itself to me outside of when I stayed there.

The next morning, I was heading back home. I checked out after breakfast, loaded the rental car, and started to drive toward the airport. As I’m going down the road, and the sun’s light is brightening the sky (it was past dawn, but not overly bright), there it was. Sitting on the hill in plain sight.

Fa’side allowed me to see her from the road as I left.

I say it that way on purpose. I was being given a parting gift from Scotland. From the land, the people, the history, the connection I’d reforged within my soul. It was a final vision of completeness, of perfection, that made for the perfect goodbye. And a promise to me that the land would remember me as much as I remembered it.

The last few weeks have been hard on a lot of people. Not just me. This memory helped, though. Because anything that can be found again after centuries of being lost is something that was never really forgotten. Just like the stories within me.

I just needed the right light to shine on them.


2 thoughts on “On castles, Scotland, and seeing the meaning of things

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